Perhaps..~

Years back..
I'm totally different..
-duh-

Years back..
I used to have somebody..
I'm happy..
We're far away..
But, I don't know that he was not that happy..
He's gone..
Perhaps I was not able to take care of him..

Years back..
I used to be a 'teddy' girl..
I'm happy..
But, I don't know that I would be warded..
'Teddy''s gone..
Perhaps that's why I dislike teddy2 things now..

Years back..
I used to wear the blue-ish army uniform..
I'm happy..
But, I don't know that it's just for 3 months..
They're gone..
Perhaps I lost them..

Years back..
I used to sleep on greens..
My TV was the sky..
Stars, meteors..wow..!!!
Awesome!
So close that I feel like want to pluck one..
But, I don't know that they'd be so far..
They're there but can't be reached anymore..
TV's gone..
Perhaps the once does not really means forever..

Years back..
I used to make mistakes..
Over and over again..
Out of anger..
Out of loneliness..
Out of sadness..
But, I don't know that I would be unhappy..
My past gone..
Perhaps I was immature and being so emotional (irrational and sensitive)..

Now..
Still..
I used to make mistakes..
Over and over again..
But, not out of those..
I may seemed so slow..
But actually I need time..
To think..
To recover..
To put things in the right place..
To give myself a chance..
To be more stronger than before..
Perhaps experience taught me a lot..

Now..
I realized that..
I'm a lil girl..
Carrying big dreams..
Walk on the small path..
It could be anytime that I can easily be slipped down..
My right arm will always hold the string..
Dragging the left to pull me out..
of this deep sadness....
Perhaps there's hikmah..

P/s: Perhaps some magic incantation, prayer, or altered state of consciousness will do the trick.- Leonard Blank -